It is with great pride and joy that I’m finally able to announce the grand opening of the Alice Malice Vaccination Station. Don’t be shy…step right up, take a seat and prepare to be inoculated against all-things boring, bland and vanilla.  No one can ignore the recent epidemic of these persistent offenders and evidence suggests they’re not only highly contagious but can be deadly.

Thankfully however a Kinky cure awaits.  Nurse Malice will inject a licentious lust-for-life straight into your gasping veins via a heady cocktail of vitamins B,D,S, and M.  And after all the deprivations of the past year I’m sure one shot won’t be enough.

Subversive Side-effects…

Don’t worry, those of a nervous disposition will be comforted by my initially warm and compassionate bedside manner.  Sadly this sweet veneer vanishes as soon as you’re restrained and rendered helpless against my unorthodox medical practices.  Sparkling eyes and a sadistic smile will observe every twitch as you surrender yourself to my healing hands, probing implements and unnerving proximity.

It is of course my professional duty to warn you of the common side-effects: Bliss.  Ecstasy.  Elation.  Fear. Rapture.  Unquestioning obedience. An unquenchable thirst for profligate pastimes.

Please register asap to avoid disappointment.  I look forward to treating your maladies and malaises soon….Malice style!!